Faced with what is happening to me now my psycho-emotional problems have virtually no relevance ...
I earnestly ask the real importance of the world that gives life.
At the end you know what I say? the people you leave, you spring, quarrels, lose your job, do not talk ... and most people are too busy to do everything rather than thinking about life, to love each other, to love those nearby. Unfortunately there are few situations that allow you to understand that life is much more than "a boyfriend left me" or "I took the examination 18" ... Well ... What I would like to find tomorrow's easter egg? Marco does not, nor a degree, or a job or a house, but the child who has lost my mother ... I want to be that small 3cm in which the heart has stopped beating back there, to grow and be born a few months.
Well, I've always lived my countless adventures (boyfriend, friends, it seems absurd mental, illness ...) as insoromontabili things and situations and from which there was no way out, and instead the only reality that has way out is death.
A person to whom I love now there beside me, but I know he is alive and this is enough for me, I'm quite ill physically, but I do not have cancer or terminal illnesses and this should make me feel good ... and in fact I'm fine.
It 's the people who complain about every little bullshit and is not able to look at solutions for what they are ... are people who want to pretend to look for solutions greater than themselves, and not content with what he has ...
well, I would be happy just to be alone, without that person, without a degree, maybe bald, ugly and stupid, but with a brother / sister ... and instead each castle that everyone had built fell in about 3 seconds.
And the agony more terrible is to see their mother crying over the death of an unborn child, not yet given birth, without a name, date, sex, a character ...
Those few moments are enough to disappoint expectations, ideas, thoughts, dreams, ambitions ... are sick enough to make an entire family who can not handle a situation bigger than it looks: a death!
There is a reason why I wrote this ... my mom is sitting in bed crying and eating snacks, my dad works 25 hours a day, stopping only because it would reflect too much on what happened, and I can not express all that much except that in writing. Once I felt more free to express especially in the company of anyone in particular, but now that someone is gone I have to adapt accordingly.
I just want to tell anybody that does not have to spend your life caring about crap ...
... because if one day the person you so loved and hated, the person with whom you have fought so much, that you sent to hell there will be more definitively, it would sell arms and legs only to see five minutes into the distance and realize that all those problems you mentioned with the word "shit" are a front for anything else ...
How much time wasted on arguing rather than to live ... and I had / have the opportunity to live, I wonder why someone like the little brother that I had, this has been denied ...
He existed in the lives of all of us for about 10 days ... also had his Easter egg, his signature on the greeting card for Grandpa Bruno and a brand new pair of shoes that had taken Aunt Lella, as well as a beautiful embroidery that I was doing cross-stitch ... and now with him there is a small medical record, whose name is "abortion procedure 10 +6" ...
I want to tell you not to leave anything open, to talk, to communicate and to love, because as long as there is love, love is everything: my mom and I do not put up with, but who 's accompanied her to the hospital? IO.
I hope to prevent others from doing what I did: to live by giving importance to read subtleties, rather than to real feelings ... and here I refer in particular to a situation.
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